Prince Charles in Vogue

Page 666 of the September issue. There's an article on eco-fashion by Prince Charles.

I don't get it either.

Isabella of France

Princess Isabella of France was born at some point in the 1290’s. The exact date is uncertain. The best guess is some time between 1292-1295, but we can’t be sure. Contemporary counts contradict each other about her age.

Isabella’s parents were Philip IV of France, and Joan I of Navarre. The French royal family was the most powerful one in Europe at this time, and given that Isabella’s mother also ruled in her own right, Isabella was very sought after as a royal bride. She was their only daughter, and her three brothers would all be Kings of France. Isabella’s mother died in 1305, and her father chose King Edward II of England to be her husband. Edward was about ten years older than Isabella, and had taken the throne at a fairly young age.

Edward and Isabella were married in 1308, when Isabella was quite young. How young we can’t be totally sure, but suffice to say she was young enough that had she lived in modern times men who were interested in her might find themselves face to face with Chris Hansen. But the marriage was probably not consummated right away. Though young, Isabella was considered exceptionally beautiful, as were her father and brothers. She was regarded not only as attractive, but intelligent and charming as well. Edward, for his part, was also considered very good looking and had long and curly blond hair.

Isabella brought with her a large dowry as well as many personal items and wedding presents. Among what she brought was a large chest of jewels from her father. Isabella naturally expected that these were going to belong to her. Edward disagreed, and gave them to his "close personal friend" Piers Gaveston. Isabella had first noticed Piers at the wedding when he and Edward seemed joined at the hip. Isabella couldn’t quite understand what was going on. Isabella was thrown to the side from the beginning of her marriage. Edward lavished gifts and affection on Piers, but couldn’t even hold up his end of the marriage agreement with Isabella. She expected to have her own household and authority over it, her own property, and access to all of the jewels and plates she brought from France.

Isabella soon discovered that she wasn’t the only person mad at Edward. Many of the noblemen in England were also frustrated with the favoritism Piers was receiving. It didn’t help that Piers loved to flaunt his position and the gifts he received from the King. In medieval times it was not unknown for Kings to have favorites, even if the favorites were other men. The problem was that Piers had more influence over the King than anyone else and while normally noblemen could expect to gain royal favor by serving at court, all of the favor seemed to be reserved for Piers. Isabella’s father, upon hearing about Edward’s behavior, sent funding to the noblemen to fund an uprising to get rid of Piers. It worked, and Piers was temporarily sent away. Edward was even briefly exiled and returned promising loyalty to his wife and fairer treatment for everyone. That lasted for about a month.

Piers was brought back and Edward continued acting just as he had before. Then another uprising occurred, this one even stronger. Isabella refused to support it because she feared they were going to kick out Edward all together which would put her in an uncertain position. Edward and Isabella were force to flee to Scotland. Except there was a war going on there, too. Also, William Wallace was dead by this point so whatever you saw in Braveheart about Isabella was very inaccurate.

Piers was captured on his way to meet up with Edward and executed. Then the nobles backed down and Edward was too upset to retaliate anymore. He even pardoned the people involved with the uprising on Isabella’s request. Things were still very unstable and even Edward knew how unpopular he was. Isabella’s life greatly improved, though. She got her own residence, and had her first child, a healthy boy, in 1312. He was named Edward like his father.

Isabella was also friendly with her aunt, Queen Marguerite, who was Edward’s step-mother. It was a bit awkward, as both Edward and Isabella were close to her and she was aware of the drama between them. Isabella had three more children, John, Eleanor, and Joan. But the marriage was not happy. Edward had found himself a new close personal friend. This one was Hugh Despenser. Hugh, and his father Hugh Sr., were powerful landowners and the medieval version of the mafia. Hugh had married Edward’s niece Eleanor, and had nine children with her. But he was still perfectly happy to be the King’s close personal friend. Hugh and Edward proceeded to paint the town red, and everyone became aware that there was a new favorite in town. Meanwhile, Hugh and his father proceeded to steal from rich and poor alike and murder anyone who got in their way. Hugh knew Edward would protect him and give him whatever he wanted.

Isabella was pissed. Hugh blatantly disrespected her and may have even physically or sexually assaulted her, knowing Edward would let him get away with anything. Isabella left London in 1323 and went on a solo tour of England, making herself more popular than Edward ever was. When she returned, Edward wanted her to swear an oath of loyalty to the Despenser family. She refused. Edward then confiscated her lands and took away her household. Another uprising occurred during this period, and while Edward was fighting the noblemen outside, Isabella hid out in the Tower of London. While there, she met Roger Mortimer, a charming young man who was kept locked up because he disrespected Hugh Despenser. Isabella and Roger hit it off immediately, even though they were both married.

After Edward won that conflict (barely) Isabella got permission to take her children and visit her family in France. Edward looked forward to getting rid of her so she’d never come between him and his beloved Hugh again. But Isabella had a plan. Shortly before she left, Roger had gotten out of the Tower and slipped across the channel. With her powerful relatives and boyfriend in France, Isabella began to scheme. She was not putting up with Edward and Hugh anymore. Most of England agreed with her. Isabella plotted with her brothers and her cousin Joan to raise an army. She knew she’d have support once she got to England, and she made an agreement to marry her cousin Joan’s daughter Philippa to her son Edward in exchange for help with her invasion.

In 1326, Isabella returned in a blaze of glory. Her and Roger took position of royal property, and imprisoned Edward and Hugh. Hugh was brutally executed alongside his father and his few allies. Edward was imprisoned and most likely "done away with" at some point in the next few years. Isabella’s son was only fourteen, so Isabella and Roger ruled in his place. They took absolute power and Isabella decided to do what every medieval monarch did upon seizing the throne; execute everyone she didn’t like. That put quite the dent in her popularity. So did her rumored killing of her husband, and her extra-marital goings on with Roger. In 1330, Isabella’s son Edward III came of age.

He did not like Roger, and was angry about Isabella’s treatment of his father. So he seized power and had Roger executed. Though not charged with any crime, Isabella lost her wealth and power. She was put under house arrest for a time, and had a miscarriage because of the stress of what she saw as a betrayal by her own son. Though having a child by a married man wouldn’t have been very convenient for her at that time. Though myth had it Isabella was kept locked away and went insane, that’s not really true. She mostly kept quiet, not wanting to further antagonize her son. She remained close to her other children, particularly her youngest daughter Joan. She often went to court to see her grandchildren and was particularly close to Edward III’s oldest son Edward, the Black Prince.

She died in 1358, an old woman by medieval standards, and was buried with the heart of her beloved Roger Mortimer.

Fergie may or may not be going bankrupt

Someone needs to learn how to manage money. Even if someone saves her she'll just end up in debt again in a few years like what happened in the 1990's.

Fergie is not royal any more and she needs to learn how to live like a normal person. She used to be a commoner so she should know how to live on a budget. I will blame The Firm for part of it as while she was married to Andrew she knew she could buy whatever she wanted without consequences. The Queen is frugal, but the rest of the Windsors sure aren't.

So when will we be seeing her on The Real Duchesses of New York?

Crown Prince Rudolph

Rudolph was born in 1858 and was the only son of Franz Joseph I of Austria and his wife Elisabeth, known as Sisi. Rudolph was raised by his paternal grandmother Archduchess Sophie. His parents had a difficult marriage and because of the complex familiar conflicts in the Habsburg family during that time period, Rudolph and his older sister Gisela were kept with their grandmother. There was a younger sister, Valerie, who was born ten years later and was raised by their mother.

From an early age, Rudolph was interested in science and politics. He was surprisingly bright for someone who came from one of the most inbred families in history. Zoology was a particular interest of Rudolph's. He published several articles on animal life around the Danube river in Hungary. In 1881 he even traveled to Palestine to study native birds. He was also interested in geology and had a large collection of rocks and minerals from all over the world. Electricity was another major interest of Rudolph, who was fascinated by new technology.

Rudolph had a very difficult relationship with his parents. His mother was never very maternal to him, and he and his father disliked each other even more than royal fathers and sons usually do. Part of it was politics. Franz Joseph was a very old fashion and conservative monarchist while Rudolph was much more liberal. Rudolph wrote many political treatises and supported modernizing the monarchy extensively. Privately, he wasn't a monarchist at all and heavily questioned his future role. He was also adamantly against his father's policies to the point that it was widely believed he was plotting to overthrow him. Rudolph also wrote for several newspapers anonymously on political issues.

In 1881 Rudolph married Princess Stephanie of Belgium, who was a daughter of Leopold II. Stephanie also disagreed with Rudolph's politics, being a staunch monarchist. The marriage was arranged and Rudolph and Stephanie were very unhappy. Beyond her problems with her husband, Stephanie was treated horribly by her in-laws and also had issues with her cruel father. Unhappily married and increasingly disillusioned with his role, Rudolph became self destructive. After the birth of his daughter, Archduchess Elisabeth, in 1883, Rudolph became mentally unstable and was involved with drugs.

He was also sexually promiscuous, like most royal heirs, and in 1886 he contracted gonorrhea. He used morphine as a pain killer and quickly became addicted. Beyond his sex and drugs, Rudolph was extremely depressed. He hated his royal life and lack or privacy and freedom. He also felt generally unloved and lonely, having never felt wanted by his parents. His marriage also became even worse after he passed his gonorrhea on to poor Stephanie, which rendered her infertile for the rest of her life.

In between bouts of sanity (and occasionally brilliance) Rudolph continued to spiral downward. In 1888 he became involved with Baroness Mary Vetsera, a seventeen-year-old girl who's mother was a royal hanger-on. Mary immediately fell in love with Rudolph, who was thirty, and became obsessed with him in the way teenage girls often do with older men. Rudolph jumped into an affair with Mary and the two became increasingly fascinated with death. Rudolph had been suicidal for a while at this point. According to some accounts he had asked his wife and then a different mistress to die with him. Rudolph was too afraid to do it alone. Mary was willing, or perhaps Rudolph simply thought she was willing. In late January, Mary ran away with Rudolph to his hunting lodge at Mayerling.

Mary left only a brief note for her mother, who searched for her child in vain for several days. On January 30th or the night before, Rudolph killed Mary either by shooting her or hitting her head with a blunt object. Accounts differ. Rudolph sat by the body for several hours writing letters to his family and gathering the courage to kill himself. He shot himself in the head in the early hours of the morning, and the bodies were found shortly afterwards.

There was an immediate cover-up. Mary's body was taken away and hidden. Her family was only able to bury her after they found out what happened and threatened to make a scandal. Her uncles were required to take her body out in their carriage dressed and posed as if she was still alive. Officially, Rudolph died of heart failure, though rumors were immediately spread and his death remains a mystery to this day. There are some conspiracy theories that involve both Rudolph and Mary having been murdered, but the murder-suicide theory is the most likely given what little evidence is available.

Rudolph's death was very significant historically. Only men could succeed to the throne in Austria, so Rudolph's sisters and daughter had no right to the throne. In Rudolph's place, the heir became his cousin, Franz Ferdinand. And we all know how that turned out.

Wallis, Part 9

This is part nine, so if you're new to the story you can find parts one through eight on my blog linked in my profile. Not too hard to find; there's a side bar with links to my old posts and the series starts in late May.

After leaving the Bahamas in Spring 1945, the Windsors took up residence in the Waldorf Towers in New York. Wallis and David brought everything they had with them and bought more in New York. They kept their suite as an apartment for whenever they were in New York for the next thirty years. Their next door neighbors and close friends there were Cole and Linda Porter. Cole Porter being the famous (and secretly gay) composer, and Linda being his witty and popular wife. Cool people, both of them; there was a musical about them called De-Lovely which I would highly recommend.

They would often go out to dinner together, and the Porters threw the Windsors a dinner party to introduce them to other members of New York society they didn't already know well. They would even walk their dogs together. Another person the Windsors became friendly with in New York was Elsa Maxwell, "The Hostess with the Mostest", who ruled society with an iron fist. Elsa was a party planner, author, songwriter, gossip columnist, decorator, and general busybody with more jobs than Ryan Seacrest. Still, she made sure she was at every major party and society event and made a point of knowing everything about everybody. Wallis and Elsa had known each other off and on in the past, but after the war was when they really became friends. They were later better known as what we'd now called frenemies, and would end up having horrible feuds, making up and being friends again, until they started feuding about something else. Elsa was from Iowa, started off with few connections, and never married. She got everything by sheer willpower and wasn't going to let anyone come along and take it from her. Elsa was also gay, which was well known at the time but not talked about. The Windsors also made friends with Hollywood types like Douglas Fairbanks Jr. and Judy Garland.

When they weren't in New York City, Wallis and David were in the Hamptons, swimming and staying with some of their rich friends. They also, during the next few years, spend a lot of time in Palm Beach. During one of those trips they met Jimmy Donahue, one of the Woolworth heirs and a cousin of Barbara Hutton, who was the Paris Hilton of her time but with more marriages. During the next few years he would cause a lot of drama in Wallis's life, but for the time being, they were just on friendly terms. In the fall of 1945, the Windsors headed back to France. Their house had been empty for the last five years and though there was a lot of dust, Wallis was happy to be back. The only problem was that they were renting, and the house was sold around the time they got back. They were allowed to stay through April 1946, but still needed to look for a new home. In October 1945, David went to London (without Wallis) to visit his mother, who he hadn't seen in nine years. Though she had previously proclaimed he could only return to London when he came to her funeral, her attitude had softened a bit during the war. Also, her memory was starting to go a bit so it's possible she forgot why she was mad at him temporarily. By the time he actually got there, she clearly remembered. They made small talk occasionally, and though David was staying with her they didn't actually see much of one another. He didn't mention Wallis at all until right before he left, when he told his mother "Don't forget; I am a married man now." To which May responded "Forget? As if one ever could!"

The previous summer Winston Churchill had been voted out. The new Prime Minister, Clement Attlee, wasn't nearly as sympathetic to Wallis and David as Churchill had been. Still, David hoped he might be able to get some kind of position as an ambassador in America. It wasn't going to happen. He also was still hung up about Wallis not being an H.R.H. and despite his complaining, that wasn't going to happen either. He returned to France less hopeful than when he'd left. The next time David returned to England, Wallis would be with him.

In 1947, Wallis and David went on a little trip to the U.K. and stayed with their old friends Lord and Lady Dudley (descended from Robert Dudley's family, if you're wondering). For the most part, the trip was kind of boring. They went shopping, took in a play, and were followed around by David's still loyal fangirls. Until the house they were staying in was robbed and the guy walked off with Wallis's jewelry case. It was a big deal.

Part of it was Wallis's fault. She didn't believe in safes or locks or any of that nonsense. No, Wallis firmly believed in leaving your valuables unlocked under your bed. Because no one would ever look there, right? Well, apparently she was wrong. The whole situation was a bit of a scandal, and it wasn't helped by Wallis's comment after the fact when asked about something that was missing. "A fool would know that with tweed and daytime fabrics, one wears gold, and with silks and evening fabrics, one wears platinum." Clearly her Marie Antoinette phase was not completely over.

Wallis never got her jewels back though the thief was eventually caught twenty years later. To this day, there's a popular theory that the theft was arranged by the royals to get back royal jewelry David had unrightfully given to Wallis. Which isn't true; Wallis never had any royal jewels at that point. There are no photos of her wearing royal jewels and no royal jewels that went unaccounted for during her involvement with David. There certainly weren't any that went unaccounted for in 1936, were seen on Wallis, then were stolen in the robbery and magically turned up back with the royal family.

For the most part, the Windsors spend the rest of the '40's in France. Right after the war, there was an amusing anecdote about Wallis throwing a very formal dinner party. Ladies had evening gloves, champagne was served, and the main course was hot dogs and baked beans. Rationing and all. Wallis explained the situation: "Y'all have to understand my meals have suffered."

They eventually found a new house outside Paris with floors paved with gravestones from the French Revolution. Most people would find that creepy, but Wallis loved it. The French government also gave them a good deal on rent. Wallis promptly stocked up in antiques and paintings for her new house. Her prize was a small end table that had once been in Versailles during Marie Antoinette's days. Though in many ways they preferred America, David and Wallis were resolved to live in France. The French government thought they were so cool they didn't make them pay taxes. That was a big deal for David. Before his abdication he had not fully understood those horrible things called taxes (presumably he believed the royal family's allowance grew on trees) and once he was made aware of the concept he'd become obsessed with getting out of paying them. Which he managed to do fairly easily by living in France most of the year. The French had similar arrangements with many European ex-royals. In the years after World War II Paris was full of foreign royalty and there were a dozen or so other ex-kings David could hang out with living there.

Wallis and David spend most of their time entertaining and being entertained. They went to lots of movie premiers and formal balls. They even had the occasional house-guest. One British noblemen described visiting and having dinner with them when Wallis asked him if there was anything he wanted to do in France. The guy said he wouldn't mind seeing some of those lovely nude dancers. Wallis didn't see the point. Her quote on the subject was that "the only woman worth seeing naked is one you've undressed yourself."

During my time digging through library archives I found an interesting article from a woman who partied with them for a while during this period. It's very reliable and believable. Not a lot of dirt or anything, though. She described Wallis:

"The Duchess was a petite woman, with a very trim figure. She had the tiniest waist I had ever seen. Her hair was jet black and cut short. It was becomingly coiffed, parted in the middle, and drawn off her face in soft waves. It was the same familiar hairstyle she wore throughout her life. She had high cheek bones, lovely violet blue eyes and a very warm personality. She spoke with a slight British accent, and I thought she looked more intriguing than beautiful."

And David:

"I observed he had wistful blue eyes, light blond hair, a turned-up nose, and deep furrows on his face. He had a small physique and was about five feet, seven inches tall. He was a wonderful dancer and had great humour. He acted very natural and charming, and wasn't a bit pretentious."

While she didn't find him pretentious, other people sometimes did. The problem was that David was so pissed off about Wallis not being an H.R.H. (she didn't care all that much) that he insisted everyone they knew call her that and curtsey to her anyway. But there was still fun to be had. In a letter to her aunt, Wallis described inviting twelve people over for a party and then drinking thirty bottles of champagne between them. A good time was had by all.